Woops, permanent damage there, just move on, I guess.

Saying that this week was a bad week for racial relations in the United States is the biggest understatement…well… of this week.  I’m not writing this to add my opinion about the Trayvon Martin/George Zimmerman trial, although I do think that talking about it is a good thing.  Growing up in the 80s and 90s, I was taught that I was supposed to be “color blind.”  I know that sentiment had good intentions, but I believe it’s a mistake to tell a child to sweep racial diversity under the rug like that.  To ignore it.  I am not color blind.   No one is, and I am wary of the ones who claim to be.   I encourage more conversation.  The more you talk about and understand what you are afraid of--and that’s what racism is, the less you are afraid of it.  0.1% of humans have escaped a bear attack by pretending the bear wasn’t there.  That is a statistic I made up just now. 

My children will have the same advantages I did.  They will be white.  It will be easier for them.  I’m not denying that.  I know what it’s like to grow up as a woman, so I’ve got that badge on my sash, but I won’t claim to understand what it’s like to grow up Black, or Latino, or Asian, or *insert all the other races I missed because I’m a jerk here.* I once witnessed my black friend get followed around a clothing store, while I was free to shoplift (and I did; I was 16, come on, so did you).  I don’t know how it feels to have to accept things like that. 

Or maybe I do, to a degree.  I know how it feels to NEED to be pretty.  How it feels to know deep down inside that my body type defines my worthiness of love.  That my big nose should be fixed before I deserved affection.  But I don’t understand what it’s like to be feared for an attribute that you were born with.  I’ve only been disrespected for it.  I realize the difference.           

In the midst of all the anger, I read maybe the most precious and encouraging thing I’ve ever read.  I read an article about children reacting to the Cheerios commercial that upset people because it features an interracial couple, with an interracial child.  One child said, “I thought Martin Luther King spoke against this and fixed this already.” 

I think that statement should serve as a reminder that this country is still a young shoplifting teenager.  The huge mistakes we made as a country really weren’t that long ago.  Our civil war ended not 150 years ago.  Louis CK says it best, “I’ve heard educated white people say, ‘slavery was 400 years ago.’ No it very wasn’t. It was 140 years ago. That’s two 70-year-old ladies living and dying back to back. That’s how recently you could buy a guy.’”

These children seemed baffled by the anger the commercial produced.  Let’s not tell them to be color blind.  Let’s tell them to try to understand it.  Let’s tell them all about the enormous mistakes our country has made.  That it’s up to us and them to make it right. 

I don’t really know where I’m going with this, but it’s my blog so shut up.  I'm not saying that this is an original thought.  I’m not even saying that I’m not racist, or even a little sexist, because that would be a stupid, pretentious thing to claim.  No one gets to stand on that soapbox.  I guess I just don’t want us to shut up about racial issues, women’s rights, marriage equality, and so on.  “Blindness” isn’t the answer.  Keep talking about it.  Be angry about it!  And then be hopeful that your children and your children’s children will be baffled that these were ever issues in the first place.    

And go eat something deep fried.  This is America.  It has perks.  You’ll feel better.  In your heart.  The metaphorical one, anyway.

http://www.ajc.com/weblogs/get-schooled/2013/jul/17/remember-cheerios-commercial-drew-so-much-criticis/

http://www.peacock-panache.com/2013/02/louis-ck-explains-historical-context-to.html